I Timothy 1:15-17

“The sins and vices in which we are so entangled that we can rarely apply ourselves to the contemplation of heaven are matters for just sorrow and inner remorse.”

          Thomas a’ Kempis

One of the things I am looking forward to as relates to Heaven is focus.  For the first time in my existence, not one the worries and fears I hold on to today will be present and I will be able to truly know what it means to focus on God.  It is so easy to lose focus.  I think that is why when I have my quiet time in the morning, I do it do candle light.  If it was dark, I would nod back to sleep.  With the lights on, I would invariably see something shiny and be distracted.  Focus is such a difficult thing.  Maybe that is why we are so impressed with people who manage to focus enough to do something well.  Larry Bird, Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, Christopher Walken (just seein’ if you’re paying attention), all excel or excelled at their passion.

For me to truly focus on God, He must become my passion.  I don’t have it all figured out.  I have a family and friends that I love and I know that God must come before them and I am trying to learn how to do that.  But I do know that He must be in my thoughts everyday.  Even more than that, every waking moment and that is a hard thing to do for someone who has the attention span of a spastic goldfish.  I must truly be consumed with, for, and by God.

Being consumed with Him means, I think, to have God in my thoughts and be in prayer constantly.  To crave His Word like oxygen and commit it to heart and mind.  Being consumed for Him to me is living everyday as a mirror of Him so that when people see me and get to know me, they can see that God is an active and real and crucial part of my life.  Being consumed by Him to me is never, never, never forgetting, even for a moment, that He loves me more than anyone ever can, could, or will.  That is a mouthful.  That is a challenge.  But it is the only challenge one can ever accept that has eternal rewards. 

I Timothy 1:15-17

“The sins and vices in which we are so entangled that we can rarely apply ourselves to the contemplation of heaven are matters for just sorrow and inner remorse.”

          Thomas a’ Kempis

One of the things I am looking forward to as relates to Heaven is focus.  For the first time in my existence, not one the worries and fears I hold on to today will be present and I will be able to truly know what it means to focus on God.  It is so easy to lose focus.  I think that is why when I have my quiet time in the morning, I do it do candle light.  If it was dark, I would nod back to sleep.  With the lights on, I would invariably see something shiny and be distracted.  Focus is such a difficult thing.  Maybe that is why we are so impressed with people who manage to focus enough to do something well.  Larry Bird, Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, Christopher Walken (just seein’ if you’re paying attention), all excel or excelled at their passion.

For me to truly focus on God, He must become my passion.  I don’t have it all figured out.  I have a family and friends that I love and I know that God must come before them and I am trying to learn how to do that.  But I do know that He must be in my thoughts everyday.  Even more than that, every waking moment and that is a hard thing to do for someone who has the attention span of a spastic goldfish.  I must truly be consumed with, for, and by God.

Being consumed with Him means, I think, to have God in my thoughts and be in prayer constantly.  To crave His Word like oxygen and commit it to heart and mind.  Being consumed for Him to me is living everyday as a mirror of Him so that when people see me and get to know me, they can see that God is an active and real and crucial part of my life.  Being consumed by Him to me is never, never, never forgetting, even for a moment, that He loves me more than anyone ever can, could, or will.  That is a mouthful.  That is a challenge.  But it is the only challenge one can ever accept that has eternal rewards. 

Job 36:15

“A good man always finds enough over which to mourn and weep; whether he thinks of himself or of his neighbor he knows that no one lives here without suffering.”

          Thomas a’ Kempis

There are days and times that I want to go home.  Not home here, but home as in Heaven.  Days come that just seem so hard and frustrating and sometimes these things just keep coming.  I feel like I am walking a tightrope, doing my best to find that needed balance and someone keeps giving me rocks to carry as well.  I don’t know what slipping off that rope would mean, other than the obvious - not good, and I grow so tired of the cliches that people casually throw about.  Sometimes I don’t want dimestore advice.  Sometimes, I just want to yell and be angry and force all of that out of my system so I can return to that highwire act called life with some degree of sanity.

God knows.  He knows.  He knows all about this life and the hardships that come my way.  He knows.  That is the thing that keeps me going on days like this.  He knows.  He is working.  He is providing strength and support.  He has not abandoned me.  He knows.  Even those to whom it appears life comes easy and runs so smoothly have their heartaches.  They may hide them better than others, but they are there.  Everybody hurts - pain does not discriminate.

God is there.  No matter how thin that silver lining is on those black clouds that cover your life, it is there.  He is doing something.  In my life, in your life, in the lives of all we know and come in contact with - He is working.  He is in the furnace.  He is using that pain and frustration to shape, mold, chisel, make me into the Jesus follower He needs me to be.  It is not easy to rest in the hurt, but it is something I need to learn to do.  I know that we live, not as God intended, but in a world stained with sin.  But only in God can we find purpose for the pain.  Only in Him will this, this life, make sense.  There. Both feet are back on the wire.  Thanks Father, I needed that.